Catharina

Yes

Yes with all my heart

Yes, I love you with all my heart

Always love you

This is your mama speaking for you, Catharina. Don’t be sad. Life may not be fair for you. I know how you struggle to live in those days. Your exile to France and change your name into Catherine. 

You sat in the edge of Rhine River. Thinking about the good days in your beloved country, our beloved country, Russia. My memory also lives in Russia, our old Russia. But, we have to live not as a Russian. I know how do you feel about it. You love Russia si much. The pain and feeling about those days is drained your energy, my child.

Just live in peace, my dear. Forget about all of those days. Forget about all the pain they gave to you, Catharina. Mama loves you always, remember that. And i’m sorry i can’t be in your side when you have to live alone, whether you are in the street or even when Nana take you to live with her. 

Nana was a nice woman, you know about it, but Nana also lose her family because of the revolution. Remember this smell, the fresh meat stuffed bread, Pirozh. You love it a lot. 

Catharina, don’t be sad

Catharina, Mama loves you.

Wipe your tears, Mama is here now to take you to be with me

I’m sorry Catharina, for abandoning you, the revolution.

Come with me Catharina. Mama loves you.

Please forgive her, Catharina is with me now

∞  ∞ ∞ ∞ ∞ ∞ ∞ ∞ ∞ ∞ ∞ ∞